(121) I’m ashamed that I can’t control my eating and drinking (with Victoria Welsby)

Have you experienced a chaotic relationship with food full of diets and shame? Do you struggle with an addiction to alcohol and wonder if abstinence looks the same with food and alcohol? Are you exploring intuitive eating concepts yet feel out of control? Listen to the latest Love Food podcast with special guest Victoria Welsby.

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This episode is brought to you by my online course, Your Step-by-Step Guide to PCOS and Food Peace™. You CAN make peace with food even with PCOS and I want to show you how.

Check out the Love, Food Podcast store. All T-Shirt designs have at least one with size range options from XS to 5X. All proceeds go to funding this labor of love to keep it as a free resource for you.

Product links may be affiliate. If you click and make a purchase, there’s no extra cost to you.

The transcribed episode can be found here.

Episode’s Key Points:

  • Special guest Victoria Welsby from BamPowLife.
  • Dieting and making strides to lose weight and change your body in an effort to get the things you want in life (or to just simply be accepted) is the rule in our society rather than the exception
  • Research shows that those who embark on a dieting journey regain a significant amount of the weight lost within the first year and all or most of the weight back at year five. So what does this mean? Diets don’t work.
  • Additionally, dieting frequently induces shame. Shame that isn’t yours to carry as you don’t fail at diets. Rather, the diets fail you and this shame burden belongs to our oppressive society.
  • Sometimes alcohol dependence coincides with one’s eating concerns. However, it is important to separate these as while you can be addicted to alcohol, you cannot be addicted to food. You need food to live whereas your survival isn’t dependent on alcohol. In addition, while you can have a “normal” physical and emotional relationship with food as you recover from disordered eating, you may not be able to have the same relationship with alcohol moving forward.
  • As you begin to heal, it is important to make space to honor how you’ve been coping and keeping yourself alive.
  • As you explore Intuitive Eating, it is common to feel like you are constantly battling your brain in the beginning. This is because your body has to learn to trust you again and know food is unconditionally accessible.
  • Be kind to yourself, be patient with yourself, and remove the shame as you begin your Intuitive Eating journey. It is challenging work and takes time.
  • Healing from internalized fat phobia is a huge part of this journey as well and means learning to feel at home in your body as it is now as there are no body size guarantees.
  • Fat bodies are “normal” bodies too. Connecting with those who live in fat bodies is an important step in healing your relationship with food and your body.

Show Notes:

Do you have a complicated relationship with food? I want to help! Send your Dear Food letter to LoveFoodPodcast@gmail.com. 

Click here to leave me a review in iTunes and subscribe. This type of kindness helps the show continue!

Thank you for listening to the Love, Food series.

Can food cure me? (Episode 120)

How many times have you read about someone curing their diabetes or PCOS with food? Feel frustrated you can’t too?? Listen to latest Love Food Podcast episode for ways to move forward while healing your relationship with food and your body.

Subscribe and leave a review here in just seconds.

This episode is brought to you by my online course, Your Step-by-Step Guide to PCOS and Food Peace™. Enrollment is now open! You CAN make peace with food even with PCOS and I want to show you how.

Check out the whole Love, Food Podcast store here. All T-Shirt designs have at least one with size range options from XS to 5X. All proceeds go to funding this labor of love to keep it as a free resource for you.

Product links may be affiliate. If you click and make a purchase, there’s no extra cost to you.

The transcribed episode can be found here.

Episode’s Key Points:

  • Do you have a long history of dieting in your efforts to control or cure a medical condition or to just feel like you fit in within our society?
  • Many of the medical conditions we experience are blamed on ourselves. You are not to blame! Food is not to blame! These conditions are often genetically-based and incurable.
  • The “Shoulds” imposed on us by society lead to guilt, shame, and distrusting our innate wisdom that we all have for identifying our body’s needs
  • Diet seduction/”Should Eat Fantasy Compliance” is commonly experienced upon embarking on a new diet as we feel like we are moving towards meeting societal body standards. However, this distracts us from the destructive nature of dieting.
  • Research shows that diets do not work long-term and they predict weight gain and exacerbate many of the markers of medical conditions. So, why do diets continue to be sought out? Fat Phobia, White Supremacy, and Misogyny. We want to feel accepted, safe, and at home in our own skin. This is completely understandable. However, we don’t need to be fixed and our bodies don’t need to be fixed. Rather, society needs to be fixed.
  • Connecting with fat activists is an important step in dismantling the “Should Eat Fantasy Compliance” and fat phobia.

Show Notes:

Do you have a complicated relationship with food? I want to help! Send your Dear Food letter to LoveFoodPodcast@gmail.com. 

Click here to leave me a review in iTunes and subscribe. This type of kindness helps the show continue!

Thank you for listening to the Love, Food series.

How do I change my eating without restricting? (Episode 119 with Vincci Tsui)

Have diabetes, high cholesterol, a food intolerance or PCOS and been told to cut something out of your regular eating? Have you finally rejected diet culture and found food peace, but are struggling with gentle nutrition? Are you concerned that changing your food choices due to health concerns might lead you back to restriction and deprivation? Listen now as special guest, Vincci Tsui, and I break down this part of the Food Peace™ journey.

Subscribe and leave a review here in just seconds.

This episode is brought to you by my online course, Your Step-by-Step Guide to PCOS and Food Peace™. Enrollment is open! Receive my FREE road map: Your First 3 Steps Toward Food Peace™ with PCOS. You CAN make peace with food even with PCOS and I want to show you how.

Check out the whole Love, Food Podcast store here. All T-Shirt designs have at least one with size range options from XS to 5X. All proceeds go to funding this labor of love to keep it as a free resource for you.

Product links may be affiliate. If you click and make a purchase, there’s no extra cost to you.

The transcribed episode can be found here.

Episode’s Key Points:

  • Nutrition is NOT an exact science!! It’s a fluid concept, and very individual.
  • Vincci Tsui joins us to chat about gentle nutrition and intuitive eating!
  • Finding the balance between gentle nutrition and diet mentality can be so hard. Too much of the nutrition information out there is so tainted with diet culture!
  • What even is gentle nutrition? It’s less about food rules, and more about what makes our bodies feel good. It’s all about our INTENTION!
  • Nutrition is super individual! Your own experience with certain foods is way more important than what the current research says.
  • There are way too many books out there that claim to be non-diet, but still perpetuate diet culture and the thin ideal. It’s so hard to escape it! So be careful with the anti-diet media that you consume, and decide for yourself which parts of these books and films are helpful, and which parts are harmful. Rely on your intuition to tell you which is which!
  • It’s about what works for YOU! The research may give us some parameters, but we need to rely on our own body cues to figure out what actually works for us. It’s literally about experimenting on ourselves.
  • You can incorporate foods that are typically considered “diet foods” without them being about dieting and weight loss. It’s about making choices out of self-care! When the intention is different, it makes ALL the difference.

Show Notes:

Do you have a complicated relationship with food? I want to help! Send your Dear Food letter to LoveFoodPodcast@gmail.com. 

Click here to leave me a review in iTunes and subscribe. This type of kindness helps the show continue!

Thank you for listening to the Love, Food series.

Does the non-diet approach make diabetes worse? (Episode 113 with Megrette Fletcher)


Does the non-diet approach make diabetes worse?? How does intuitive eating fit when a person has real health concerns are impacted by food choices? Listen now to get my tips on how to grapple with this part of the Food Peace™ journey. Special guest expert is Megrette Fletcher, diabetes AND mindful eating dietitian expert.

Subscribe and leave a review here in just seconds.

This episode is brought to you by my online course, Your Step-by-Step Guide to PCOS and Food Peace™. Sign up now to get on the waitlist for the next enrollment period in April, and receive my FREE road map: Your First 3 Steps Toward Food Peace™ with PCOS. You CAN make peace with food even with PCOS and I want to show you how.

This episode is also brought to you by my new Fat-Positive Dietitian t-shirt and mug! All proceeds go to funding this labor of love to keep it as a free resource for you. Check out the whole Love Food Podcast store here. All T-Shirt designs have an option with sizes ranging from XS to 5X.

Product links may be affiliate. If you click and make a purchase, there’s no extra cost to you.

The transcribed episode can be found here.

Episode’s Key Points:

  • Black and white thinking is a cognitive distortion. Real like, and real health, isn’t like that at all. Being a weight-inclusive, fat-positive, non-diet dietitian is NOT an approach that harms health.
  • Gastric bypass does NOT rid the world of fatphobia! The answer to this problem is a combo solution: to help people heal their relationship with food AND with their bodies. Part of this means healing the cultural fatphobia our world is currently struggling with.
  • Megrette Fletcher joins us to talk about medical nutrition therapy!
  • Moving away from a job that doesn’t support our passions and values is an amazing step.
  • The culture surrounding diabetes is super saturated by diet culture, and so moving out of the diet-centric paradigm in diabetes work is hard! Before insulin was invented, restriction was the only way we knew how to manage the disease.
  • We need to pause and think, why are we so afraid of nourishing the body?
  • When we teach diabetes from a Health at Every Size perspective, we address every body as an individual.
  • We’re ALL marinating in diet culture, and people who struggle with diabetes exist in a diet-culture pressure cooker. We don’t cause diabetes as it’s a genetic disease, but so much of diet culture blames the individual and individual food and exercise choices.
  • Compassion is KEY for diabetes care, as there really isn’t a cure and it’s not a disease anyone asks for. It’s a genetic condition that’s VERY complex.
  • The goal needs to be to nourish the body, period. Where our weight ends up doesn’t matter!
  • No matter what your body size, you need to eat! We need more food than we think, and we’re allowed to nourish our bodies.

Show Notes:

Do you have a complicated relationship with food? I want to help! Send your Dear Food letter to LoveFoodPodcast@gmail.com. 

Click here to leave me a review in iTunes and subscribe. This type of kindness helps the show continue!

Thank you for listening to the Love, Food series.

When relying on hunger is too scary

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Does the idea of relying on your hunger and fullness cues freak you out? Seem waaaay too scary? Please hang on. This post is for you. And, be sure to know you are not alone.

I can’t stop thinking about food!

Attuned eating is letting go of distractions and relying on your hunger, fullness, and satiety cues to guide eating instead of rigid diets. Some people also call it Intuitive Eating (check out the brand new workbook edition here it is fabulous). If your brain thinks about food, eating, and their rules most of the day, attuned eating will feel a bit premature. We often call this way of thinking food preoccupation. I see it as food rules have taken your brain hostage. The way out of this crisis is to retrain your brain to not think about food. All. The. Time.

Before you look into brain surgeons, know we have tools outside of the operating room. And, all you need to do the work includes a way to know time (either your watch, cell phone, or the sun), a shelf stable snack of your choice, and patience. Bring lots of patience.

Disconnecting from hunger makes us think more about food

We get disconnected from our hunger cues because our brains have been distracted by food rules, not prioritizing self-care, and emotional dysregulation. If you are disconnected from hunger, there was a time when you were not. There was a time when your body consistently provided the information you needed to eat adequately. Diets and other means to learn food rules disconnected you. So does a chaotic life with little self-care. If you are running around like a chicken with a head cut off, then you are not stopping to eat when hungry nor pee when need to pee. (That’s for all my nurses and teachers…talking to you!)

You also get disconnected if you are used to feeling certain emotions and reaching for food. Emotional eating is a touchy word in my book because everyone emotionally eats. It is human and part of cultural connections. And healthy. What I am talking about though is when a person feels an emotion, whether uncomfortable or warm fuzzy, and the brain automatically feels connection with certain foods. I like to call this symbolic hunger discussed in another post.

How do we rewire our noggins?

Diets, lack of self-care, and emotional dysregulation can all disconnect your hunger and make your brain over think about food. To retrain your brain, practice these steps over the next 2 to 4 weeks:

Pick your check in times.

What time do you wake up? Now set an alarm on your phone for every two to three hours after this time throughout the whole day. If you don’t use a smart phone, pencil it in your calendar. These times are your check in times.

Go through the check in routine.

Within the first hour of being awake and every check in time, go through this routine: take 3 deep breaths and ask yourself: “What do I need right now?” By what do I need I am referring to anything. If nothing surfaces ask these:

Do I need to pee?

What am I feeling?

Am I hot or cold?

Do I want or need to eat?

What to do about food at check in times?

At each check in time, give yourself permission to eat outside of physical hunger. If you are not feeling hunger cues, you need to eat at some point (hello, you are human!). By doing this, you will reset your circadian eating rhythms which will gradually reset your hunger cues to be consistently noticeable.

What to do about food outside of check in times?

When craving to eat or binge outside of check in times practice gently saying: “I am craving food right now. It is symbolic hunger. I can have as much as I want or need at the next check in time.” If you find yourself not able to wait, please forgive yourself and move on. Those who are successful at this part of the process are folks who keep trying. So dust yourself off and look to the next check in time. It will get easier after more practice.

What to expect

Practice these check in times over the next 2 to 4 weeks. Remember to be extra kind to yourself and forgive when making mistakes. Everyone does during this process. After a few weeks, your brain will start to get used to a rhythm from the check in times and eating times. More space will occur outside of eating and hunger cues will begin to percolate to the surface. And when they do, welcome them home. Let hunger know you won’t be ignoring it anymore rather wanting to get to know its purpose.

Let me know when you start to experience the hunger cues coming back. It is an exciting reuniting process!

 

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Want a guide to partner with you on your Food Peace journey? I want to help. Check out my podcast and I hope it illuminates the direction you want to go.