Help me make peace with food while losing weight.


Are you trying to make peace with food, but still trying to lose weight? Do you want to know if there is a way to pursue weight loss AND heal your relationship with food? Are you struggling with what you see as an addiction to food? Listen now to hear my insights on this complicated food peace issue.

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This episode is brought to you by my PCOS summer series: Empowering Your PCOS Journey. You CAN make peace with food even with PCOS and I want to show you how. This series and our Facebook group will be with you every step of the way.

Episode’s Key Points:

  • The pursuit of weight loss CANNOT be combined with making peace with food… so now what??
  • Thinking about food addiction leads to issues with food preoccupation. We NEED food to survive and thrive! We shouldn’t pathologize the desire for food.
  • There isn’t ONE diet that, for most people, can help maintain weight loss for more than two years. In fact, most dieters regain all their lost weight, plus more, within five years. Dieting predicts weight gain!!
  • Ancel Keys’ Minnesota Starvation Experiment: strong and fit men were fed half of the amount of nutrition they needed. Eventually these men became depressed and food preoccupied, and experienced a decrease in libido and in interest in extracurricular activities.
  • Weight loss pursuits promote restriction, and restriction leads to food preoccupation… so we can’t pursue weight loss without it resulting in food preoccupation.
  • Remember, even if you decide to leave dieting and intentional weight loss behind, it will still take TIME to end your struggles with food preoccupation. Make sure you have a team behind you to support your healing!
  • We live in such a fatphobic world! It’s important that we break down our own internal biases related to fatness, and face our own fat discrimination.
  • What is really behind the fear of fat? Explore that to figure out what’s really behind the obsession with weight loss, and to discover what’s keeping you stuck in disordered eating patterns.

Show Notes:

Do you have a complicated relationship with food? I want to help! Send your Dear Food letter to LoveFoodPodcast@gmail.com. 

Click here to leave me a review in iTunes and subscribe. This type of kindness helps the show continue!

Thank you for listening to the Love, Food series.

I can’t tolerate my changing body. {with Ellie Herman Pike}

Have you embraced body trust, but are suddenly up against a trigger such as body changes? Are you concerned about relapse, and are trying to maintain recovery through a stressful time? Listen now for advice on navigating this part of the food peace journey.

Subscribe and leave a review here in just seconds.

This episode is brought to you by my PCOS summer series: Empowering Your PCOS Journey. You CAN make peace with food even with PCOS and I want to show you how. This series and our Facebook group will be with you every step of the way.

Episode’s Key Points:

  • Our bodies are ALWAYS changing, especially as women. We go through pregnancies, menopause… so how do we engage in body trust when our bodies keep changing??
  • Sometimes pregnancy can help grant a reprieve from an eating disorder.
  • Weight gain fears with pregnancy are so common!
  • Stressful transitions can trigger a relapse… Ellie Herman from Eating Recovery Center in Denver, Colorado joins to talk about how to keep us safe in these difficult times.
  • Anxiety about body changes is normal! Take a breath, and remind yourself that it’s going to be okay.
  • Eating disorders feel so isolating, but the truth is that you are not alone.
  • Sometimes people with a history of food and body struggles will place the stress and blame of new life changes on the body. We fixate there because that’s familiar! But the truth is that this body anxiety might be about something else entirely.
  • Find an eating disorder therapist or dietitian to help you on this journey.
  • Investigate what body discomfort means to you! Does it tend to come up with strong emotions, or with the stressors of life? Sit with that discomfort and fear and be curious about it.
  • Acceptance and Commitment Therapy (ACT): If we try to push discomfort and fear away, it only brings on more discomfort and fear! Try connecting with your values, and continue living towards those values while still making space for that discomfort.
  • Post-pregnancy can be a big trigger for relapse… for new moms, remember that nourishment for yourself is also nourishment for your child! Focus on taking care of yourself, along with taking care of your new baby.
  • Start a gratitude practice to help ground you in your recovery.

Show Notes:

Do you have a complicated relationship with food? I want to help! Send your Dear Food letter to LoveFoodPodcast@gmail.com. 

Click here to leave me a review in iTunes and subscribe. This type of kindness helps the show continue!

Thank you for listening to the Love, Food series.

Love Food Podcast Episode 73

Are you worried about your bikini body? Does vacation food make your anxiety spike and start the inner dialogue of self-loathing? Is preoccupation with your body getting in the way of you enjoying time spent adventuring? Listen now to hear my tips from a previous Love, Food Podcast episode on how to start living in the moment.

Subscribe and leave a review here in just seconds.

This episode is brought to you by Pursuing Private Practice Masterclass.

Ready to start doing things your way and kiss the corporate world goodbye?

Details here and remember the super secret discount code BOSS for 10% off.

Episode’s Key Points:

  • Food should help us enjoy life MORE, not detract from the experience.
  • The best way to keep yourself bingeing while on vacation is to restrict before, and plan to restrict after. A lack of permission throughout the year leads to “indulging” while away!
  • When you’re on vacation, you’re there to enjoy the food and experience life the way another culture does… not to obsess over what you’re eating and how it may or may not be impacting your body size.
  • How do we work on permission to help prevent this kind of preoccupation about food and body during vacation?
    • Think about a pendulum (courtesy of Maria Paredes)… if we don’t interrupt the calm sway, the highs and lows stay pretty even-keeled. This is what an intuitive, normal relationship with food looks like! If we eat past fullness for any reason, the pendulum adjusts and we eat less at some point in relation to our intuitive hunger signals to make up for it. This is how our body takes care of us! BUT if we look at the pendulum another way, with a disordered relationship with food, we can see violent swings back and forth between restriction and bingeing. SO the only way to stop it from moving violently in the bingeing direction is to STOP pulling in the direction of restriction!
    • Take a hands-off approach!!
    • Check out my blog post to learn how to slow down that pendulum!
  • It’s ABNORMAL to have a competent relationship with food in our culture!!
  • Being human is about following rhythms… the seasons, hunger… we can’t contain these rhythms, but we should trust them!
  • When we step away from diets, it’s NATURAL to experience a feeling of rebellion. The best way to bypass this rebellion is to immerse yourself in this “vacation brain” while you’re at home.
  • Eating when you’re hungry and stopping when you’re full is simple, but it’s NOT easy!
  • Unconditional permission is FUNDAMENTAL to food peace and intuitive eating.
  • Restricting food will only lead to bingeing, and if you want to have a vacation experience free from food preoccupation and filled with cultural immersion, it’s time to take away the food rules and diet talk during your regular, everyday life.
  • Always remember to reach out to an eating disorder dietitian to help you on your food peace journey!

Show Notes:

Do you have a complicated relationship with food? I want to help! Send your Dear Food letter to LoveFoodPodcast@gmail.com. 

Click here to leave me a review in iTunes and subscribe. This type of kindness helps the show continue!

Thank you for listening to the Love, Food series.

My mom put me on my first diet.

Do you have a love/hate relationship with food? Are your food issues related to your fear of gaining weight? Have you been struggling for some time, going back and forth between recovery and eating disorder behaviors due to the fear around what food peace truly means? Does food insecurity impact your relationship with food? Listen now for some tips on how to overcome these challenges.

Subscribe and leave a review here in just seconds.

This episode is brought to you by Pursuing Private Practice Masterclass.

Ready to start doing things your way and kiss the corporate world goodbye?

Details here and remember the super secret discount code BOSS for 10% off.

Episode’s Key Points:

  • Meret Boxler, host of the Life. Unrestricted podcast, shares her letter about her food peace journey and struggles!
  • None of this is your fault!!
  • Sometimes our family dynamics produce a situation in which the children have to become their own parents to survive. This can impact our relationship with food very deeply.
  • Ellyn Satter’s food hierarchy of needs versus the Maslow hierarchy of needs: our foundational needs must be met in order to build towards needs higher up the pyramid. If we’re struggling with our foundational needs, we won’t be motivated to reach for our more nuanced needs.
    • For example, food security is the foundation of the food hierarchy of needs. If someone wants to work towards wellness, food security must be established first!
    • Some examples of food insecurity: poverty, growing up with caregivers who were always on diets or policing food etc. These environments prevent a foundational sense of food security from forming.
  • Wellness is NOT the most important thing in our relationship with food… it’s food security. Permission around foods (especially fun foods!) can be part of the big picture of healing from a past of food insecurity.
  • Feeling our feelings is very important in this food peace process!!
  • If we work at it, our needs around permission and food security will eventually be met. Be patient! You are worth this work!!
  • Food peace is your birthright.
  • Weight stigma is at the core of a lot of our food peace struggles. It is OPPRESSIVE! We need to stop the discrimination based on weight, rather than push people to change their bodies.
  • We need to end weight-based bullying!!
  • The media tells us which body sizes are acceptable. Representation of ALL kinds of bodies is so important.
  • Weight-based stigma in the eating disorder community is a big problem! You can’t tell by a person’s appearance if they’re struggling with an eating disorder.
  • Weight is NOT indicative of health! All bodies of all sizes and abilities can strive for health-promoting behaviors, including body acceptance and intuitive eating.
  • Self-compassion is key!!

Show Notes:

Do you have a complicated relationship with food? I want to help! Send your Dear Food letter to LoveFoodPodcast@gmail.com. 

Click here to leave me a review in iTunes and subscribe. This type of kindness helps the show continue!

Thank you for listening to the Love, Food series.

I’m a food addict. {guest Marci Evans}

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Would you consider yourself a food addict? Do you find yourself trying to abstain from certain foods so you don’t “lose control?” Are you unsure if food addiction is the right way to describe what you’re experiencing? Listen now for some expertise on the latest research and find out more about the truth behind the food addiction model.

Subscribe and leave a review here in just seconds.

This episode is brought to you by Pursuing Private Practice Masterclass.

Ready to start doing things your way and kiss the corporate world goodbye?

Details here and remember the super secret discount code BOSS for 10% off.

Episode’s Key Points:

  • Holidays like Easter and Passover can bring foods out of the woodwork that we don’t usually eat! (Think: chocolate bunnies, Peeps, jelly beans.) When these foods resurface, because we haven’t learned to make them “neutral” yet, it can feel like we’re addicted to them when they’re finally around.
  • Our bodies don’t need to rely on dieting to find health. In fact, dieting HURTS us, and it can lead to bingeing and an OCD experience with food.
  • Eating is just like peeing!!! When you gotta go, you gotta go, and how much or how little you pee doesn’t matter. But with hunger, there is so much JUDGMENT attached to it. So what if we took that judgment away? What if we treated eating just like peeing? They’re both bodily functions that do just fine on their own without outward policing. So stop judging when you’re hungry, or how much or how little you need to eat to feel satisfied! Eating is like peeing.
  • Marci Evans joins to talk about her expert knowledge on food addiction research!
  • Food doesn’t need to have so much power!!
  • You are NOT alone… your pain is individual, but your experiences with food are so common.
  • What are the first steps to making peace with food when dealing with these problems??
    • Compassion!
    • Challenging food addiction in and of itself
  • The food addiction model is problematic and has many limitations!
    • The term “food addiction” is very poorly defined in the research community.
    • Most 0f the research has been done on animals, not humans, and the research that has been done on humans has had a LOT of mixed results.
    • It fails to consider alternatives to the biological response to food that mimics drug use, such as pavlovian conditioning, the fact that food is meant to be rewarding, or the impact of restraint, restriction, or previous dieting on our pleasure reactions.
  • Food is meant to be rewarding!!
  • The pattern of restriction and restraint that then swings to bingeing can lead someone to think they’re addicted to food… but that might not be the case! Bingeing is often a reaction to deprivation!!
  • Current food addiction research does NOT account for restraint, restriction, or dieting history.
  • Our natural biology REBELS against restraint!!
  • So how do we move beyond the food addiction model?
    • Remember you are not alone!
    • Consider what “healthy” means to you, and make sure it’s BALANCED and SATISFYING.
    • Use resources to support your journey.
    • Notice what’s happening in your body instead of what’s happening in your brain.
  • Once we take the judgment away, we can really listen to what our body actually needs.
  • Our body craves balance!!
  • Remember, healthy eating includes satiety and pleasure! If you deny these parts of eating, you won’t find a peaceful relationship with food.

Show Notes:

Do you have a complicated relationship with food? I want to help! Send your Dear Food letter to LoveFoodPodcast@gmail.com. 

Click here to leave me a review in iTunes and subscribe. This type of kindness helps the show continue!

Thank you for listening to the Love, Food series.